I thank my God always, making mention of you in my prayers, because I hear of your love and of the faith which you have toward the Lord Jesus and toward all the saints. (Philemon 4-5)

Now, this verse is a little bit jumbled up. This is, in the Greek language, what we call a chiastic arrangement. In other words, the words and the thoughts in the verse are arranged in a crisscross fashion.

The first expression — “I hear of your love” — goes with “toward all the saints.” And the second expression, “faith,” goes with the first expression, “toward the Lord Jesus.” So when he says “faith,” he’s talking about the “faith which you have toward the Lord Jesus”; when he says “love,” he says the “love which you have toward all the saints.”

And that’s the second characteristic of a forgiving person: “You love the saints.”

This is agape love. This is the love of choice, the love of self-sacrifice, the love of humility. This is the love that says, “I don’t care about myself; I care about you.” This is the love that says, “I’ll make any sacrifice to meet your need.” This is the love that says, “I’m not compelled to serve you because there’s something about you that’s attractive; I’m compelled to serve you because there’s something about the power of God within me that moves me that way.”

This is the love talked about throughout the New Testament:

For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision means anything, but faith working through love. (Galatians 5:6)

Now as to the love of the brethren, you have no need for anyone to write to you, for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another. (1 Thessalonians 4:9)

And hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us. (Romans 5:5)

We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brethren. He who does not love abides in death. (1 John 3:14)

If you are a Christian, you have the capacity to love. You have been taught by God to love.

You cannot ask an unbeliever to forgive. The love they know about is the love of feeling and the love of emotion, not the love of choice and the love of commitment. If it’s self-serving, they’ll do it.

So Paul effectively says, “Philemon, you’re a forgiver because you have a concern for the Lord and you have a love for the people.” Then Paul continues with this:

And I pray that the fellowship of your faith may become effective through the knowledge of every good thing which is in you for Christ’s sake. (Philemon 6)

Paul refers to “the fellowship” of Philemon’s faith, praying that it will be “effective,” or powerful. Now, something that’s true of all Christians, including Paul and Philemon, is that we care about the fellowship.

We care about the body of Christ. We are concerned about others. We say, “Look, I want to forgive you because I don’t want chaos in the fellowship. I want harmony, peace, and unity.”

Among believers, there’s no room for individualism that says, “I really don’t care about you. I’m going to take what I want, ask what I want, give only what I want, and do things my way, because I’m the one that I care about.” A Christian doesn’t say that.

A Christian says, “I care about the fellowship. I care about you. I care about our unity. I care about our ministry. I care about our mutual sharing.”

The word here for fellowship, koinonia, is a hard word to translate. It is most often translated “fellowship,” but when we talk about fellowship in English, we usually mean just enjoying somebody’s company. But that’s not what Paul is about here. The best way to translate the word here might be “belonging.” Believers belong to each other in mutual partnership.

So what’s the implication for Philemon?

Well, Onesimus is returning to him, having become a Christian since he ran away. That makes Onesimus part of the fellowship that Philemon cares so much about. So when Paul says, “I’m praying that your fellowship will be effective,” we can hear him saying, “If you forgive Onesimus, it’s going to have a powerful impact.”

This was a serious felony for which the slave could lose his life. If Philemon forgives him, it’s going to send a strong message to the church about the priority of the fellowship, and of loving each other as believers. It will be Philemon saying, “This man now belongs to me not as my slave, but as my brother, and my brother needs forgiveness.”

If you can take a sinner back and embrace that person in love, you have made a strong statement about your concern for fellowship.

So a person with true, saving faith is concerned about the Lord. A person who has had the love of God shed abroad in his heart is concerned about other people. And a person who cares about the fellowship and has the priority of the mutual belonging of believers in his mind is going to be the kind of person eager to forgive.

If you love the Lord, love people, and love the fellowship, you’ll be a forgiver.

This post is based on a sermon Dr. MacArthur preached in 1991, titled “The Characteristics of One Who Forgives.”