Unfading
     Beauty

What do you mean when you speak of God answering your prayers?  Most often do you really mean that He said “yes” to your petitions?  One of the most challenging lessons for Multi-tasked Women to learn is that “yes,” “no,” and “wait” are all responses to her requests. 

What is your reaction when you earnestly pray that a situation will have a specific outcome, and the response from your heavenly Father is no or wait?  Do you believe that there is no good thing that He will withhold from you if you are walking uprightly (Psalm 84:11) and focus on your responsibility of walking uprightly; or are you like Elijah when he fled from Jezebel to the wilderness, sat under a juniper tree, and wished to die (1 Kings 19:4)?  The woman who chooses the response aligned with Psalm 84:11 embraces contentment, while the one who opts for an Elijah Effect is courting discouragement.

            Discouragement, extracted from the Greek word athumeo, means to be disheartened, dispirited, and discouraged;¹ it frequently occurs when there is a discrepancy between expectation and fulfillment.  As an emotion, discouragement’s roots are frequently planted in the soil of idealistic expectations such as holding perfectionist standards for yourself and others, embracing impractical outcomes for the institutions you are associated with, and anticipating unrealistic benefits from work, leisure time, education, or marriage.  The greater the discrepancy between hope and fulfillment, the greater the potential for discouragement—and in many instances the resulting emotion of discouragement is actually anger without enthusiasm.  You know from Scripture that anger for a selfish reason is sin (Psalm 4:4; Ephesians 4:32).

            A study of Scripture reveals that discouragement was a reaction of many of the individuals recorded in its pages.  As believers we should learn from both their positive and poor responses to cope with discouragement in our own life (1 Corinthians 10:6) and to offer encouragement to others

(2 Corinthians 1:3-7).  Consider the following:

· Cain, when God pronounced judgment upon him for the murder of Abel (Genesis 4:13-14).

· Hagar, after she was cast out of the household of Abraham because of Sarah’s jealousy (Genesis 21:15-16).

· Moses when he was sent on his mission to the Israelites (Exodus 4:1, 10, 13; 6:12), at the Red Sea (Exodus 14:15), and when the Israelites lusted for flesh (Numbers 11:15).

· The Israelites because of the cruel oppression of the Egyptians (Exodus 6:9).

· Elijah following his flight from Jezebel (1 Kings 19:4).

· Hannah as she experienced infertility (1 Samuel 1-2).

·  Job following the devastation of his life (Job 3:1-26, 17:13-16).

· David through multiple difficulties (Psalm 41 and 51).

· Jeremiah often called “the weeping prophet” (Lamentations 3:1-21).

· Jonah after he had preached to the Ninevites (Jonah 4:3, 8).

· The mariners with Paul (Acts 27:20).

An analysis of Elijah's life (1 Kings 19:1-22; 2 Kings 2:1-10) provides us with biblical guidelines for detonating discouragement.         

            Elijah emerged from his experience at Mount Carmel a victor—the 450 false prophets of Baal were destroyed, and the calamity of drought and famine brought about by idol worship ended (1 Kings 18:18-46).  Regrettably, Jezebel did not share his enthusiasm over the victory—in fact, she was very angry (1 Kings 19:1-2)!  Instead of surrendering, as Elijah expected, she issued an ultimatum to him, “So let the gods do to me, and more also, if I do not make your life as the life of one of them by tomorrow about this time” (1 Kings 19:3).   Elijah’s response is similar to that of many Christians—they observe God perform repeated miracles in their lives—then a bit of minor turbulence occurs and the downward spiral of the Elijah Effect sets in:

· The cycle of fear of others or specific circumstances begins (1 Kings 19:1-2).

· The logical reaction is to run from the problem (challenge), rather than facing it head-on

(1 Kings 19:3).

· Rather than meditating on God’s faithfulness, faulty negative thinking begins (1 Kings 19:4).

· The faulty negative thinking is fanned by emotional and physical fatigue which frequently produces discouragement (1 Kings 19:5-9).

· Further faulty negative thinking yields false expectations and unrealistic attitudes regarding the responsibilities God calls one to assume (1 Kings 19:10).

· These false expectations and unrealistic attitudes can lead to the cultivation of self-pity (1 Kings 19:14).

An intervention for the downward spiral of the Elijah Effect must be applied for it to begin the reversal process—in Elijah’s case, as in ours, the intervention cycle to renew his spirit included:

· Resting and relaxing—too many times when the Elijah Effect begins Multi-tasked Women increase their activity rather than reduce it (1 Kings 19:5-9).

· Seeking solitude to focus on communion with God (1 Kings 19:9-13).

· Using the Word of God as a sword to fight the source of discouragement, Satan (Ephesians 6:17).  Acquiring God's truth and promises during times of refreshment enables us to engage confidently in battle; for example, Psalms 33, 42, 43, and 71 teach us the hope we are to have in God.  Lamentations 3:21-23 describes the downcast man who nevertheless relies on the steadfast love of the Lord. The passage of 1 Peter 1:13-21 challenges us to proclaim the faith and hope we can have in God through Jesus Christ while Romans 8:18-39 reminds us that nothing can separate us from God’s love.

· Realizing that refreshment comes through resuming activity since it allows us to focus our vision outward rather than “soaking and souring.”  Balancing the quantity of time invested and the intensity of the activity will ensure that the Elijah Effect does not recur (1 Kings 19:15-18).

· Allowing friends to minister to us (Proverbs 17:17).  It is well to remember that it is as important  to be a friend, as well as to find one and that we are to accept God's provision for relationships, rather than imposing our expectations.  A study of some of the noteworthy soul relationships recorded in the Scriptures—Jonathan and David (1 Samuel 18:1, 19, 20, 23:16), Ruth and Naomi (Ruth 1-4), Paul and Timothy (1 Corinthians 4:17, 16:10; Philippians 2:19-22), and of course, Elijah and Elisha (1 Kings 19:19-21; 2 Kings 2:1-18). Elijah and Elisha possessed an unusual relationship—one in mind and purpose to serve Jehovah God; they built many memories together because Elisha willingly ministered to Elijah, offering encouragement and affirmation.  The loyal partnership that developed provided a companion to compensate for Elijah's discouragement—and when God was ready to take Elijah to heaven, Elisha succeeded him in his prophetic office (2 Kings 2:9, 13).  Their adventures to Gilgal (2 Kings 2:1), Bethel (2 Kings 2:2), Jericho  (2 Kings 2:3-4), and the Jordan River (2 Kings 2:6) are a reminder that memories require time and energy to create and pose the question, "What blessings would Elijah and Elisha have been deprived of had either refused to accept God's provision and perhaps mourned for his own expectations?"

As you consider Elijah’s life, are you a woman who chooses the Elijah Effect or embraces contentment when faced with circumstances that could breed discouragement?  Remember that godliness with contentment is great gain (Psalm 37:16; 1 Timothy 6:6) while despair plus discouragement equals spiritual disaster and purpose to detonate discouragement as you multi-task!

A walk through a bookstore, pharmacy, or an internet search quickly reveals that worry, anxiety, and depression are prevalent maladies in twenty-first century society.  Research reports that 2 to 8% of the population suffers from General Anxiety Disorder (GAD).  This disorder is one of the major reasons people choose to visit a psychologist.  Women tend to seek help twice as often as men.  There is no specific age for the onset of GAD, yet research suggests that it commonly surfaces between the ages of 20 and 40.  Symptoms include sweating, accelerated heart rate, dry mouth, stomach upsets, dizziness, and lightheadedness.¹

            Panic Disorder (PD) affects 1.7% of the U.S. adult population between the ages of 18 and 54.   Women are twice as likely to develop panic disorder.  Panic Disorder causes people to feel terror suddenly and sometimes unexpectedly.  Accompanying physical signs include dizziness, lightheadedness, rapid pulse, trembling, chest pains, shortness of breath, nausea, numbness, and a fear of going crazy or of dying.  Panic Disorder can start to become debilitating when the person suffering begins to avoid situations or stimuli in which an attack is assumed to occur.²

            While the medical terminology associated with worry, anxiety, and depression may be new, their incidence is as old as antiquity—Solomon’s words, “there is no new thing under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 1:9) accurately summarizes their longevity.  Sarah and Hannah fretted about their barren wombs (Genesis 16:1-16; 1 Samuel 1:1-28); Naomi’s anxiety caused her to develop a bitter spirit (Ruth 1:1-22), while Job’s wife’s despair was so great that she counseled her husband to “curse God and die!” (Job 1:9).  Biblically the verb care (merimnao) is used to describe anxiety, worry, and depression³—behaviors that divide the mind between worthwhile interests and damaging thoughts.  The Apostle James succinctly describes the miserable condition of the person with a divided mind—“a double minded man is unstable in all his ways” (James 1:8).  Worry generates many negative and no positive results; those who choose to worry allow themselves to become victims rather than victors over circumstances because they choose to “lean on their own understanding” rather than trusting in the timeless principles contained in the Word of God (Proverbs 3:5-6).  As you multi-task what is your reflex reaction when circumstances beyond your control occur—do you worry or do you trust?

Just as good physical health is the result of implementing sound health practices, so good spiritual health is the result of applying sound spiritual practices; remember God's Health Plan for a peaceful heart that we discussed in a previous entry?  The opposite of one debilitated by worry chooses to practice its four essential elements.

 Let’s take some time to examine your spiritual health—answer each of the questions that follow using specific examples from your life.  They are divided into categories to allow you to assess where your strengths and weaknesses (opportunities for growth) occur.

As I attempt to maintain a healthy spiritual weight do I . . .

Understand that I have no need to be afraid of my future because God will instruct me and teach me in the way in which I should go; He will counsel me with His eye on me? (Psalm 32:8)

Have the confidence that there is no good thing that God will withhold from me if I walk uprightly? (Psalm 84:11)

Believe God is able to do exceedingly abundantly beyond all I ask or think because the Holy Spirit works within me? (Ephesians 3:20)

Trust that God will supply all my needs according to His riches and glory? (Philippians 4:19)

Ask in faith without doubting, realizing that the one who doubts is unstable? (James 1:6-8)

As I attempt to maintain a healthy spiritual pulse rate do I . . .

Have the confidence that the Lord will take care of my concerns and thank Him for doing so? (Psalm 138:8)

Believe that God cares for me because I am His child and thank Him that I have no need to be anxious for tomorrow, since it will be taken care of by Him? (Matthew 6:25-34)

Thank my heavenly Father that He gives me peace that the world cannot give? (John 14:27)

Refuse to waver in unbelief but grow strong in faith, giving God the glory, and be fully assured that what He has promised He is able to do? (Romans 4:20-21)

Have confidence that if I ask for anything in God’s will, He will hear me, but I will have a gracious limitation because His will is always best for me? (1 John 5:14-15)

As I attempt to maintain a healthy spiritual blood pressure do I . . .

Trust in the Lord with my whole heart, and refuse to lean on my own understanding? (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Believe that I will accomplish much if I have faith and do not doubt? (Matthew 21:21)

Focus on the reality that I have no reason to be anxious about what I shall eat, the clothes I need, or where I will live because God will provide all these things for me?  If God can take care of the birds and the lilies of the field, then why should I worry about my needs?  Am I not more valuable than they? (Luke 12:22-34)

Understand that it is impossible for me to be successful and please God if I lack faith?  (Hebrews 11:6)

Let Him have all my worries and cares, for He is always thinking about me and watching everything that concerns me? (1 Peter 5:7)

As I attempt to maintain a healthy spiritual diet do I . . .

Have the confidence that His grace is sufficient for me, for His power is perfected in my weakness? (2 Corinthians 12:9)

Consider that it is God who is at work in me, both to will and to work for His good pleasure? (Philippians 2:13)

Have the faith that God is able to do exceedingly abundantly beyond all I ask or think because the Holy Spirit works within me? (Ephesians 3:20)

Understand that I am not adequate in myself, but my adequacy is from God? (2 Corinthians 3:5)

Believe that because I have been crucified in Christ, I no longer live, but Christ lives in me; and the life I now live, I live by faith? (Galatians 2:20)

If we desire to be spiritually strong, we will refuse to divide our minds with worry since it.......

does not accomplish anything (Psalm 37:8).

is needless to worry because God has everything under control (Matthew 6:31-33).

            can only be removed by prayer (Philippians 4:6-7).

            is a waste of time (Luke 12:25-26). 

            Just as worry divides the mind, peace unites it.  If you are to win over worry, anxiety, and depression then you must fix your mind on your heavenly Father for only He provides perfect peace.  As you multi-task, contemplating on the meditation thoughts and Scriptures contained in this entry and in previous entries will keep your mind focused on your Lord’s care for you (Isaiah 26:3)!

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¹ Found at www.anxietysecrets.com/anxpanic.htm.

 

² Ibid.

 

³ W.E. Vine, Vine’s Expository Dictionary of Old and New Testament Words. (Grand Rapids, Mich.: Revell), 1981, s.v. “care, careful, carefully, carefulness.”

 

            If you are thirsty and are given a glass of water that is half-full what is your response?  Are you thankful for its contents or do you complain because it is not full?  The level of gratitude that accompanies your response will undoubtedly impact how well your thirst is quenched. 

            The English word gratitude is derived from the same word that gives us grace.  Did you know that gratitude and grace are Siamese twins?  As Christian women we daily experience the grace of God—if we are looking for ways to acknowledge that God's grace is at work in our lives and the lives of others, then we will have many reasons to express gratitude.  However, if we complain more frequently than we express gratitude we are setting ourselves up for long-term devastating effects on both our physical and spiritual lives.  I can personally attest to the negative impact that a complaining spirit has on one’s life; before our Lord drew me into His family, my attitude was so negative that when I awoke each morning my first reaction was, “I wonder what terrible thing is going to happen to me today.”  I was always a prophet of my own doom—by nightfall I had several items to add to my list of “Poor Pat Protests.”  Unfortunately, I carried my negative, complaining spirit into my new life as a Christian.  Then one day my pastor began to preach about “walking in the spirit” (Galatians 5:16), and I learned that my negative, complaining spirit was SIN rather than the discerning spirit I attributed to it.  I also learned that the best antidote for a complaining spirit is a thankful spirit, and that was something I needed to cultivate daily.  He challenged his congregation to make a list of the things we were thankful for and when we were tempted to complain, instead choose to meditate on all of God’s gifts to us.  I accepted his challenge, purchased a pretty journal that invited me to write in it, and began by writing Psalm 103 on the first page.  Daily I recorded only God’s blessings to me—and I found my attitude gradually changing.  I have filled multiple journals, and at least one entry a week records my heavenly Father’s blessings to me.  Now when I feel a tendency to revert back to my habit of “Poor Pat Protests” I spend time reviewing my journals and find that by the conclusion of my reading session my “protests” have turned to “praise!” 

            Giving thanks for everything seems like an oxymoron.  Twenty-first century society tells us that this is an unrealistic expectation.  However, the Bible directs us to give thanks for everything (1 Thessalonians 5:18).  As you consider the concept of gratitude, in relation to this short poem do you believe that it is an unrealistic expectation?

We can give thanks in everything

And say, ‘Your will be done.’

For God’s at work in everything

To make us like His Son.¹

            Real gratitude expands our ministry opportunities.  The more thankful we are, the more we are aware of our many blessings.  If we only offer praise and thanksgiving when things go our way, we develop tunnel vision.  However, if we are grateful for all that our heavenly Father brings into our lives, then our horizons are expanded and our ability to sincerely offer praise, regardless of the circumstances, increases!  As this character quality becomes more evident in our lives others will be attracted to us rather than repelled—thus expanding our ministry borders.

Again, I can speak with conviction about this spiritual principle.  Many circumstances in my life (being abandoned as an infant, being orphaned by adopted parents in my early twenties, being single, to name a few) initially appeared to be legitimate reasons to complain.  However, as I chose to believe that my Lord is a sun and shield; that He gives grace and glory; and that there is no good thing that He will withhold from me if I am walking uprightly (Psalm 84:11), I realized that all I need to do is take care of the walking uprightly part (that includes being grateful for all things), and He will do the rest!  Looking in retrospect at the seemingly devastating circumstances, I can now see how my loving heavenly Father used each as a vehicle to minister to others as well as to shape my character.  The September 16 selection of Joy and Strength contains a piece of prose written by Priscilla Maurice (1810-1854), which clearly describes this thought:

            Begin with thanking Him for some little thing, and then go on, day by day, adding to your subjects of praise:  thus you will find their numbers grow wonderfully; and, in the same proportion, will your subjects of murmuring and complaining diminish, until you see in everything some cause for thanksgiving.  If you cannot begin with anything positive, begin with something negative.  If your whole lot seems only filled with causes for discontent, at any rate there is some trial that has not been appointed you; and you may thank God for its being withheld from you.  It is certain that the more you try to praise, the more you will see how your path and your lying down are beset with mercies, and that the God of love is ever watching to do you good.²

            When we study Christian biographies we learn that God's "giants" were people who knew how to praise the Lord in the midst of suffering.  God used their lives to impact others because they knew how to give thanks—even in difficulties.  Are you the type of Christian woman whose prayer list is filled with personal wants, while your praise list stays the same or shrinks?   Or are you choosing to be a Multi-tasked Woman who offers praise and thanksgiving daily?  Your response to these questions determines your level of spiritual maturity.  If you are . . .

·                     increasing in your knowledge of the Word, then you have many reasons to thank our Lord.

·                     seeking to serve others (Mark 10:45), then you will have new motivation to praise the Lord.

·                     looking for ways to bear the burdens of others (Galatians 6:2), then your praise for what God is doing will probably increase. 

            Praise should touch every area of our lives.  If it is our heart’s desire to mature as a Multi-tasked Woman then we will praise more and complain less! 

            So, if praise is pleasing our heavenly Father and propels us into a mature, godly woman what is the primary obstacle?  Simply stated the primary obstacle is pride—and it is most often revealed through an attitude of criticism.  We will not always get the best or have people serve us in the way we think we deserve; in fact, the Lord may reprove us by giving us the opposite of what we expect.  Pride not only goes before a fall (Proverbs 16:18), it also goes before a lot of disappointments.  Our heavenly Father wants us to strive for spiritual maturity; pride and selfishness hinder the process.  As Multi-tasked Women, we will want to remember that the first of the seven things that are an abomination to our Lord is “haughty eyes” or a “proud look” (Proverbs 6:16-18).

            It is not always easy to look up and say, "Thank you, Lord," when circumstances are challenging; however, it is a necessary reaction and one that demonstrates that you are exercising your will rather than your emotions.  While our Lord may not change the circumstances, praise will effect what the circumstances do to us.  Remember, the Psalmist directs his writings to the will, not the emotions!

            The unsaved world is accustomed to hearing people complain; they really don't know what to do with people who are joyfully praising the Lord!  The Philippian jailor (Acts 16:25-29) was not brought to Christ by the earthquake—that made him want to commit suicide!  It was because Paul and Silas praised the Lord—under difficult circumstances—that the man heard the Gospel and knew that there was a way of salvation.  It is a sober realization that a complaining Christian woman will be a pitiful witness for her faith; in reality, she is too much like the world to have much effect on it. The story of the 10 lepers highlights the fact that we are prone to accept blessing without saying “thank you."  Too often Christian women are like the nine lepers who were healed of a disease that labeled them as outcasts of society; they wanted the gift of healing but failed to give thanks to the Lord Jesus (Luke 17:11-19) once it was bestowed. Paul provides a severe warning in 2 Timothy 3:1-7 to believers who fail to offer thanks.

            Just as we delight in hearing others express gratitude to us, so God finds great delight in hearing His children say, "thank you."  He inspired the Psalmist to write, "It is good to give thanks to the Lord" (Psalms 92:1); since saying “thank you” pleases God and encourages others, Multi-tasked Women will do it often!  As you multi-task, remember . . .

If we were thankful for everything

The way God tells us to be,

What a wonderful change in our living

We would be able to see!³

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¹D. De Haan from Our Daily Bread.

 

²Tileston, Mary Wilder. 1929.  Joy and Strength.  Minneapolis:  World Wide Publications, 260.

 

³ Author Unknown

 

 

An Attitude of Gratitude Makes Our Lives a Beatitude

True praise is an enriching experience. It was so with David.  As you read his Psalms of praise, you find him thanking God for things in heaven and things on earth.  For material blessings and spiritual blessings.  For joyful experiences as well as difficult experiences.  The challenges David experienced enriched his life because he knew how to praise the Lord.  Consider his words . . .

·                  "Thou hast enlarged my steps under me” (Psalm 4:1).

·                  "Thou hast enlarged my steps under me, that my feet did not slip" (Psalm 18:36).

When difficulties befall us, they only become a liability when we complain.  However, if we choose to praise God, those same difficulties will allow our lives to become a Beatitude.              

An increase in the frequency of praise and thanksgiving is evidence that an attitude of gratitude functions in our lives.  When we choose to expand our praise life, expressing gratitude to both our heavenly Father and those who enrich our earthly existence is a reflex response. As we experience this response we can then say like David, "He also brought me out into a broad place; He delivered me because he delighted in me" (Psalm 18:19). 

Diagnosing and Cultivating an Attitude of Gratitude

So, as the holiday season approaches, are you excited about giving the gift of gratitude?  Your results on the Gratitude Gauge you completed as you read Part One will help you respond to the question.  Use the Gratitude Gauge Scale to interpret it.

Gratitude Gauge Scale

100-90 - a maturing attitude of gratitude

89-80 - a commitment to an attitude of gratitude

79-70 – an understanding of what constitutes an attitude of gratitude

69-60 – a minimal commitment to an attitude of gratitude

59- 0 – an attitude adjustment is needed

Now that your attitude toward gratitude is diagnosed, consider completing this project designed to help you to focus on cultivating an attitude of gratitude.  I believe that as you conclude it you will find that you have many gifts of gratitude to distribute.  The impact on your bank account—nothing.  The blessings bestowed on others—immeasurable!

·                     Simple things I thankful for:

·                     Specific people I am thankful for:

·                     Write a note of gratitude to at least five of the names you listed.  Place a check mark by their names when the notes have been sent.

·                     My reaction to Expressing Gratitude:

·                     Evaluate your Gratitude Gauge Score.

·                     Use the verses that follow to develop principles for increasing your Gratitude Gauge Score.  I provided an example for you.

Ø      Psalm 18:49—I will choose to give thanks to God and sing praises to His name.

Ø      Psalm 103:3-5

Ø      Romans 1:21

Ø      1 Thessalonians 5:18

Ø      1 Corinthians 15:57

Ø      1 Timothy 4:4

·                     As you contemplate your gift list this holiday season, will you place Gratitude at the top?

Many of the readers of Unfading Beauty took the time from their impacted schedules to complete the “My Perceptions on Homemaking Survey.”  At its outset I prayed for the return of 1000 surveys.  When the data collection began earlier this month 1,966 surveys were returned.  Truly our gracious heavenly Father said “yes” to the prayer.  A special thank you to all who participated in the study!

            I wanted to provide a brief summary of the study in this edition of Unfading Beauty.  If you would care for the full summary simply e-mail me at drennis@masters.edu.

The Population

            The age range of the population was 15-90 with the median age falling into the 45-54 age range.  Seventy-five of the respondents were male and 1,891 were female.  Six different continents were represented.  1,948 of the respondents considered themselves Christians while 18 did not.

Survey Results and Implications

The enthusiastic response to the survey suggests that a need exists for the 21^st evangelical community to seriously consider the need for the implementation of the Titus 2:3-5 principle that challenges women to acquire the facts and life skills needed to successfully manage their home.  Likewise, it must acknowledge, identify, and correct the devastating effect that feminism continues to exact on its members.

 While not reported in this summary, the e-mails that accompanied the requests for the summary of the survey findings reflected a deep concern that the generation of younger women is frequently theologically sound but practically inept in the godly attitudes and skills required to manage a home that glorifies their heavenly Father.  Thus, the admonition offered in Titus 2:5 is coming to fruition—God’s Word is being discredited.

The mean scores of the 869 respondents between age 45 and 90 indicated that they possess the majority of the skills and much of the knowledge to establish a godly home.  However, the same respondents listed the very skills that they practice skillfully as deficient in the younger women.  Just as the younger women should embrace a teachable spirit towards acquiring the knowledge base and skills for successful home management, so the older women must heed the Titus 2:3-5 instruction to be willing to teach the younger women.  Only when the younger and older partner together to fulfill this biblical mandate will the Christian home be recovered.

            The survey contained 3 open-ended questions:

·                    Feminism has impacted the 21^st century culture in the following ways:

·                    Feminism has impacted the 21^st century evangelical community in the following ways:

·                  The homemaking skills many Christian women lack are:

The cumulative response (each respondent was able to list three reasons) to the statement,   “Feminism has impacted the 21^st century culture in the following ways” totaled 3,115. These responses revealed the following general effects:

Feminism has impacted the 21^st century culture in the following ways:

a. Moms/women working outside the home  

b. Demeaned the model of biblical womanhood

c. Breakdown of the family

d. Weakened/devalued men

e. Increased abortion  

The cumulative response (each respondent was able to list three reasons) to the statement

“Feminism has impacted the 21^st century evangelical community in the following ways” totaled 2,570.  These responses revealed the following general effects:

Feminism has impacted the 21^st century evangelical community in the following ways:

a. Women pastors/leaders

b. Lack of biblical submission

c. Women working outside the home

d. Lack of understanding of biblical gender roles

e. Weakened family/increased divorce rate

The cumulative response (each respondent was able to list three reasons) to the statement, “The homemaking skills many Christian women lack are” totaled 3,886.  These responses revealed the following general effects:

The homemaking skills many Christian women lack are:

a. Cooking                                                                              

b. Sewing                                           

c. Organization

d. Time Management

e. Hospitality

f. Cleaning

What Will Happen with the Survey Results?

This summary provides a global analysis of the survey data.  Continued in-depth analysis will allow the data to be used to its fullest potential.  I will report the results on Unfading Beauty as it becomes available.  Thanks again for your interest in the study!

Thanksgiving ushers in the holiday season.  Tantalizing aromas, gala events, and clandestine shopping trips consume much of our time from late November to January 1.  Easily caught up in the activities of the holiday season, it is easy to neglect the most important present to offer others—the gift of gratitude. 

Before the gift of gratitude is unwrapped, may I encourage you to spend some time responding to the “Gratitude Gauge”?  It is designed to help diagnose your attitude toward gratitude.   The “Gratitude Gauge Interpretation” will be posted in the next entry.

Gratitude Gauge

Place the number that best reflects your response to the statement in the space provided. 

Use the following scale:

5 = regularly                                                   2 = seldom

4 = usually                                                      1 = very seldom

3 = sometimes                                                0 = never

1.                             I quickly acknowledge that expressing gratitude is a biblical instruction.

2.                             I recognize that a complaining spirit is symptomatic of the fact that I lack a grateful heart.

3.                             I understand that cultivating a grateful heart is a life-long process.

4.                             I believe that the condition of my spiritual heart determines my spiritual health.

5.                            I am increasing in my knowledge of the Word.

6.                            I thank my heavenly Father for my spiritual blessings.

7.                            I thank my heavenly Father for my material blessings.

8.                            I thank my heavenly Father for my joyful experiences.

9.                            I thank my heavenly Father for my difficult experiences.

10.                        I offer thanks to others when they extend kindness to me.

11.                        I seek to speak encouraging words to others.

12.                        I quickly acknowledge that sincere gratitude enriches my life.

13.                        I am seeking seek to serve others.

14.                        I maintain contact with missionaries and seek to share some of their burdens.

15.                        I understand that giving thanks is generated from my will.

16.                        I am aware that being thankful is generated from my emotions.

17.                        I "pause for praise" throughout the day.

18.                        Others affirm my grateful spirit.

19.                        I acknowledge that how I respond to the biblical instruction about expressing gratitude affects my spiritual health.

20.                        I am like the one leper described in Luke 17:15-16 who returned to thank the Lord for healing him.

            Gratitude Gauge Total

Unwrapping the Gift of Gratitude

The English word gratitude is derived from the same word that gives us grace.  Do you know that gratitude and grace are Siamese twins?  Since Christians daily experience the grace of God, and if they look for ways to acknowledge that it is at work in their lives and the lives of others, then they have many reasons to express gratitude.  However, many complain more frequently than they express gratitude—and they don't realize what devastating effects their complaining has on their spiritual lives.  Though they may temporarily feel better emotionally for transferring their negative thoughts to others, the spiritual toll that the emotional release renders is often devastating. 

The impact of a negative, complaining spirit is significant, as the following example illustrates. A part of my advising responsibilities includes the completion of a “Senior Contract” for each of my advisees anticipating graduation.  Since the task is time-consuming, I eagerly agreed to be a part of the piloting of an online version of the “Senior Contract.”  It was an incredible experience! I quickly e-mailed the programmer and expressed my gratitude for his work on the project.  His response brought tears to my eyes—“Thanks for your kind words.  I usually only hear from people if they have a complaint!”  I was again reminded that the best antidote for a complaining spirit is an attitude of gratitude, and that is something that must be cultivated daily.

The Gratitude Cycle

Did you know that true gratitude expands your ministry opportunities?  Consider the “Gratitude Cycle”:

·                  The more thankful we are, the more we are aware of our many blessings. 

·                  If we only offer praise and thanksgiving when things go our way, we develop tunnel vision. 

·                  If we are grateful for all that our heavenly Father brings into our life, then our horizons expand.

·                  When our horizons expand, our ability to sincerely offer praise, regardless of the circumstances, increases! 

I can speak with conviction about the validity of the “Gratitude Cycle.”  Many circumstances in my life (abandonment as an infant, orphaned by adoptive parents in my early twenties, being single, to name a few) initially appear as insurmountable obstacles. However, as I choose to believe that my Lord is a sun and shield; that He gives grace and glory; and that there is no good thing that He will withhold from me if I am walking uprightly (Psalm 84:11), I realize that all I need to do is take care of the walking uprightly part (that includes being grateful for all things), and He does the rest!  Looking in retrospect at the seemingly devastating circumstances, I can now see how my loving heavenly Father used each as a vehicle to shape my character and to enhance my ministry to others.

Thank you very much to those of you who participated in the survey being conducted to discern the perception of Christians about the life skills commonly associated with the management of the home. We have had an excess of 1900 responses! If you would still like to participate in this survey, please use the link below.

There are two ways you can participate:

• Complete the survey by clicking on this link or copy the following link into your browser: 
  http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=5_2bZtXdA7wAavmfimfqrfRA_3d_3d
  
  
• Forward the link to the appropriate individuals on your e-mail address list.
  
  
• Distribute the survey/survey link to those in your Sunday School class, Bible study, etc.
  • If you are willing to distribute the suvey in your Christican circle, I will reimburse you for the copy charges and postage.  
  • Simply request a reproducible survey and reimbursement form from me (drennis@masters.edu).

Thank you!

I recall finishing a class session one Friday afternoon with five questions that were focused on gracious speech.  As I closed in prayer I asked my heavenly Father to remind everyone in the class, including the professor, to put their conversations during the weekend through the grid of these questions.  When I returned to class on Monday, I noticed that Melanie, a generally gregarious young woman, was glumly slumped in a chair in the back row of the classroom.  I approached her and inquired, “Melanie is there something the matter?”  She responded, “Yes, there is—you ruined my weekend!”  Since a major assignment was not due that day, I was curious as to how I so negatively impacted her weekend.  “Could you share with me how I ruined your weekend?”  “Well, you know how I LOVE to talk—but since I asked myself your five questions before speaking, I found that I did not have much to say.  That’s how you ruined my weekend!”  I finished our conversation by affirming my pleasure in her choosing to apply what I was teaching her—she simply sighed as I walked to the front of the classroom.

You may be curious as to the content of the five questions that had such a profound effect on Melanie’s weekend—I want to share them with you; however, before I do I need to place them in context.  I was teaching about the biblical Multi-tasked Woman found in Proverbs 31 and  challenging my students to implement the truth of Proverbs 31:24, “she opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.”  I encouraged them to say to anyone who begins to share information they know they cannot refrain from repeating, “Stop, please do not tell me that—I am not trustworthy!”  The conclusion to the day’s lecture was a challenge to put everything they said during the weekend through the grid of five questions . . .

·                     Is it kind?

·                     Is it necessary?

·                     Is it true?

·                     Is it gossip?  (Sharing private information with those who are not a part of the solution)

·                     Am I defending my own opinion rather than listening to the individual?

As Melanie reviewed these questions she found that she needed to allow her Lord to help her learn to speak graciously—as you consider them how would you evaluate your speech?  The Multi-tasked Woman who speaks graciously exhibits some specific qualities . . .

·                     She uses good judgment and discretion (Colossians 4:6). 

·                     Rather than being too aggressive or bossy, gentleness (Proverbs 15:1) and compassion characterize her words (Ecclesiastes 10:12-14). 

·                     She possesses the ability to be kind, yet very firm, as well as the ability to maintain confidences. 

·                     Truthfulness is evident in her relationships with others (Ephesians 4:15).

·                     She realizes that what she meditates upon will emerge in her speech (Psalm 19:14; Luke 6:45).

·                     Within her family relationships, she refuses to discredit her husband’s character and speaks with firmness, balanced with kindness and gentleness, when disciplining her children. 

Having placed her speech through the characteristics for gracious speech, the Multi-tasked Woman chooses to make encouragement a part of her lifestyle—especially since it is a spiritual directive (Hebrews 10:25).  She understands that the act of biblical encouragement inspires others with renewed courage, spirit, and hope and affirms individuals for who they are rather than what they do and knows the value of graciously spoken words (Proverbs 25:11).  Realizing that encouragement does not thrive in a negative atmosphere, she chooses to memorize and meditate upon the portions of God’s Word that can contribute to her words being filled with blessing, graciousness, and sweetness (many of these verses are included in the Scriptures at the conclusion of this chapter).  And, she acknowledges that if gracious speech is not a natural temperament attribute that it will undoubtedly take time for it to become an automatic reflex!

            What type of speech emerges from your lips?  As you multi-task will you purpose to ask your heavenly Father to assist you in learning to speak graciously so that your words are—“like apples of gold in a setting of silver” (Proverbs 25:11)?

As I position the Home Economics Department at The Master's College to prepare our graduates for productive ministry I am reminded of the significant contribution a Home Economist/Family and Consumer Scientist makes to 21st century society.  Since there is a lack of current research addressing this topic by Christians I am conducting a study to discern the perception of Christians about the life skills commonly associated with the management of the home.  Perhaps you are willing to assist in the project. 

There are two ways you can participate:

• Complete the survey by clicking on this link or copy the following link into your browser: 
  http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=5_2bZtXdA7wAavmfimfqrfRA_3d_3d
  
  
• Forward the link to the appropriate individuals on your e-mail address list.
  
  
• Distribute the survey/survey link to those in your Sunday School class, Bible study, etc.
  • If you are willing to distribute the suvey in your Christican circle, I will reimburse you for the copy charges and postage.  
  • Simply request a reproducible survey and reimbursement form from me (drennis@masters.edu).
    

• Potential book.
  
• Potential articles for Christian periodicals.
• PowerPoint presentations, handouts, and transparencies.
• Lecture materials.
• Seminar presentation materials.

Thank you for considering my request.  I do thank my heavenly Father upon every remembrance of you!

I have had the privilege of having a chapter published in Pearl Girls: Encountering Grit, Experiencing Grace.  It will be released by Moody at the International Christian Retailers’ Show (ICRS) in Denver.  I am looking forward to attending the event.  Proceeds from the sale of the book will benefit “Wings,” a safe-house for the victims of domestic abuse in the Chicago area, and “Hands of Hope” whose outreach targets the enormous impact of poverty and the HIV/AIDS epidemic among women and children in Africa (www. http://margaretmcsweeney.com).